GOOD-NATURED BLASPHEMY

Scripture that was cut when they edited the first Bible

A LETTER FROM PAUL TO THE FALLOPIANS

~~ I, Paul, humble servant of the Lord, called to be an apostle and a celibate scribe who writes long rambling sentences without semicolons but with plenty of commas, send my greetings to the residents of the Province of Fallopia, wherever the hell that is, and to all women of the known world, because I wouldn't waste any of my blood which I use for ink here in prison writing to women of the unknown world, would I? When Holy Scripture got collated into the Bible, which means "book", even though books haven't been invented yet, this letter will probably get left out, but the part about wives being "submissive to their husbands" will make it in, and the clergy will be stuck for all time with the problem of explaining it away. Well, I gotta go and do my laundry now and try to get these blood stains off my sackcloth without turning it pink, like celibates will do for ages to come. Grace and peace to you from my boss and from Her son, too.

More Good-Natured Blasphemy: The Dead Psea Psalms