Three Letters from Reform School

June 1

Dear Mom
I arived here at the Jewvenile Detenshun Center this afternoon. It wont be so bad to be here fer a year!! My roomates name is Scooter -- or Shooter -- Im not shur witch becuz he kinda slurs his words. He says he talked bedder befour he pulled his gold teeth out with the vice grips so hr could pay some bills. He only has one eye but he is real nice -- he is gonna let me keep the pale on my side. Cool! Our room is the size of the bed room at home and there are 7 fewer peopul sleeping in it! We got a baskutball cort and cabul TV and even bedder drugs than in the Bronx. Well, gotta go now– the crap game is starting.
Your son
Sniper



Awegust 12

Hey Mom !!!
Ooo wow! The glowing whales eyes and flying motorcicles are awesum! In the woodworking shop Shooter (or is it “Scooter”?) gave me a vitomin pill that really worked fast. But I got confused and acidentally drilled a hole in the back of my left hand -- clear thru. I couldn’t figger out how to turn the drill off. The blood sprayed out like one of them twirling lawn sprinklers and got on everbuddy. What a hoot! Mebbe Ill put a big ring or somethin thru the hole – a gold one to match the 4 in my lip. And Scooter (or is it Shooter?) played a joke on me and crushed my trigger finger with a hammer. Oh, oh -- the whales eyes are blinking and spinning now and I think Im gonna puke.
Bye
Sniper


May 23

Dear Mom
The wardun told me he was gonna send me home in a week. I cant beleeve I’ve been here a hole year. Time shur flys when your having fun. Gosh I’m gonna miss my frends here and the vitamins and the occasional beatings. Some of my frends like Shooter (or is it Scooter?) are turning 18 and there getting promoted to a high scool called “Atica”. The wardun told me I might get to go there somday, too, but rite now I have to go home. Im thinkin about doing somethin when I get home so that I get to come back real soon. Is ther anybuddy you want ded?
See you in a week
Sniper